Insecurity in relationships, hand in hand with jealously, is one of the biggest romance killers a relationship can face, short of infidelity. You have a good thing going; you adore each other and love spending time together. And yet you still can’t shake that feeling that something is going happen to end your blissful state. You are right on that count. Your insecurities will stand in the way of your happiness.
Everyone needs a sense of safety and security, as well as affirmation that we are loved and cherished. However, if you need constant appraisal and reassurance, there is a problem. You might believe that you partner will leave you at any moment, since you are not attractive or smart enough. You might get agitated when they spend time with friends instead of with you. It is time to start dealing with insecurity in your relationship.
Dealing with insecurity in a relationship is no big issue, if you are willing to work at it.
Yes, you are insecure. This is not a flaw or personal weakness. Many confident people you know have their own insecurities; they are just better equipped to deal with it.
Back to the source
What is really making you feel the way you do? Is it really justified because someone said something hurtful to you 10 years ago and you can’t let go? Think long and hard about the first time you have ever felt insecure, and about what triggered it. Chances are, you can relate that incident to your current thought patterns.
Talk it out
Once you have established the reason for your insecurities, be open and honest about this with your partner, so that they can understand where you are coming from. Now that you have discovered the source of your fears and shared it with your significant other, together, you can find a constructive way to deal with the situation
Lacking self-confidence is part of the root cause. You need to take some time out for yourself to do what makes you feel good. Work on your self-image. A makeover is typically seen as a chick-flick movie montage, but contrary to popular belief, revamping your look is vital in feeling better about yourself. To overcome old fears and issues, you have to recreate yourself into the person you would like to be.
- Accept yourself, flaws in tow. Your partner chose you because out of want, and not out of pity.
- Exercise. Working out is starting to sound to the like the common cure for all ailments, but for good reason. Not only is your body releasing happy mood enhancer chemicals, but you will feel much better about yourself when your body is healthy.